Why does the wife refuse to fulfill her marital duty. What to do if the wife constantly refuses her husband and does not fulfill her marital duty

). What means: " due goodwill"? The wife has no power over her body, but there is slave and mistress together husband.

If you deviate from proper service, then offending God; if you want to evade, then only with the permission of your husband, even if it is for a short time. That is why he calls this matter due, in order to show that none (of the spouses) has power over himself, but are slaves of each other. So, when you see that a harlot is tempting you, you say: my body does not belong to me, but to my wife. Let the wife say the same to those who attempt to violate her chastity: my body does not belong to me, but to my husband. If neither husband nor wife has power over their own body, much more so over property. Listen, you who have husbands and who have wives: if you are not to consider the body as your own, much less your property. True, in some places in both the Old and New Testaments a great advantage is given to the husband; so it says: “Your desire is for your husband, and he will rule over you”(Gen. 3:16); and Paul in one epistle makes this distinction (between spouses): “husbands, love your wives…but let the wife be afraid of her husband”(Eph.5:25, 33); but here (attributed to both) equal power, no more, no less. Why? Because he is talking about chastity. In other respects, he says, let the husband have precedence, but not in chastity, nor "Husband has no control over his own body" nor a wife (1 Corinthians 7:4). Great equality of honor and no advantage.

"Do not deviate from each other, except by agreement"(1 Corinthians 7:5). What does it mean? The wife should not, says, abstain against will husband, and husband (should not abstain) against will wives. Why? Because from such abstinence comes great evil; from this often there were adulteries, fornications, and domestic disorders. For if some, having their wives, indulge in adultery, how much more (will they indulge in it) when they are deprived of this consolation. Well said: do not deprive yourself; what I called deprivation here, I called debt above, in order to show how great their mutual dependence is: to abstain to one against the will of another means to deprive, but not to the will. So, if you take something from me with my consent, it will not be deprivation for me; deprives the one who takes against the will and by force. Many wives do this by doing big sin against justice and thereby giving husbands a pretext for debauchery and leading to disorder. Unanimity should be preferred to everything; it matters most. If you want, we will prove it by experience. Let there be a wife and a husband, and let the wife abstain when the husband does not want it. What will happen? Will he not then commit adultery, or, if he does not commit adultery, will he not grieve, worry, inflame, quarrel and cause much trouble to his wife? What is the use of fasting and abstinence when love is violated? No. How much grief will inevitably arise from this, how much trouble, how much strife!

If a husband and wife do not agree in the house, then their house is no better than a ship overwhelmed by the waves, on which the helmsman does not agree with the helmsman. Therefore (the apostle) says : "do not deviate from each other, except by agreement, for a while, for the exercise in fasting and prayer." Here he means prayer performed with special care, because if he forbade those who copulate to pray, then where would the time for unceasing prayer come from? Hence, Can and with a wife to copulate and pray; but with abstinence, prayer is more perfect. He did not simply say: pray, but: yes, abide, because the (marriage) matter only distracts from it, but does not defile. “And then be together again, lest Satan tempt you.” Lest you think that this is a law, add a reason. What? "Lest Satan tempt you." And so that you know that it is not the devil who only happens to be the culprit of adultery, he adds: "your intemperance."

In view of the fact that many abstain and have pure and chaste wives, moreover, they abstain beyond due, so that abstinence becomes an occasion for adultery, in view of this he (Apostle Paul - Ed. Right blog) says: let each one use his wife. And he is not ashamed, but enters and sits on a bed day and night, embraces husband and wife, and joins them together, and calls aloud : "Do not deviate from each other, except by agreement"(1 Corinthians 7:5). Do you observe abstinence and do not want to sleep with your husband, and he does not take advantage of you? Then he leaves home and sins, and in the end his sin is due to your abstinence. Let him sleep with you rather than with a harlot. Cohabitation with you is not forbidden, but cohabitation with a harlot is forbidden. If he sleeps with you, there is no guilt; if with a harlot, then you have ruined your own body. So, [the apostle] sits down almost on the marriage bed and cries out: "Do not deviate from each other, except by agreement." For this you [wife] have a husband, for this you [husband] have a wife, in order to observe chastity. Do you want to have abstinence? Convince your husband also that there are two crowns - chastity and harmony, but that there is no chastity and battle, that there is no peace and war. After all, if you abstain, and the husband is inflamed with passion, and meanwhile adultery is forbidden by the apostle, then he must endure the storm and excitement. But "do not deviate from each other, except by agreement". And, of course, where there is peace, there are all blessings; where there is peace, there chastity shines; where consent is, there abstinence is crowned; and where there is war, chastity is undermined. But do not deviate from each other, except by agreement. Every master of marriage is surpassed by Paul, the leader of the universe. Therefore, he is not ashamed to say: “Marriage for all, let it be honest and the bed is immaculate”(Heb. 13:4). After all, his Lord Himself came to the marriage, honoring the marriage with His presence, and even brought gifts, turning water into wine. So, strive [in abstinence] as much as you like; when you are weak, take advantage of the fellowship [marriage], so that Satan does not tempt you. There are three ways of life: virginity, marriage, fornication. Marriage is in the middle, fornication is below, virginity is above.

Virginity is crowned, marriage is proportionately praised, fornication is condemned and punished. So, keep the measure in your temperance, according to how much you can curb the infirmity of your flesh. Strive not to exceed this measure, lest you fall below any measure. As one who wants to dive goes as far into the water as he can enter, but when he enters, he sees how far he will have to return, so be chaste as much as you can bear so that you do not fall too much.

Sources: St. John Chrysostom.

Unfortunately, many married couples face difficulties in intimate life, and some husbands complain that their wives are completely untempered. And yet, it is important to note that this is a rather rare case when a woman herself has a rather low sexual activity. It often happens that husbands who consider their wife cold or almost frigid are surprised to learn that she has a lover. Why does this happen, and how can it be avoided?

Why a woman does not want a man - the most common reasons

So, consider the most obvious cases due to which a woman can avoid intimacy with her partner.

You've been together for too long, feelings have cooled

You have been together for more than a month and the former fuse, of course, has already been left behind. Some couples, even after several years of living together, maintain passion in their intimate relationships and "warm up" each other's feelings, but for this you need to have a mutual desire, constantly show imagination and initiative - for many people this is almost overwhelming work. And yet it is important to note that even if you have been together for a long time, no extravaganza is happening in your relationship, and you are not doing anything in order to correct this state of affairs, this does not mean at all that everything is lost for your relationship. If you still live under the same roof, then you have a chance to rectify the situation. Remember that life and habit have become enemies for harmony in the relationships of many couples, and this can be changed if desired.

Wife is pregnant or has not passed away after a recent birth

The period of expectation of a baby and the first months of life often becomes a happy time in the life of most couples. And yet, during these months, many spouses are forced to face some restrictions in intimate life. Not every husband treats this situation with understanding and patience, which gives rise to conflicts in the family and repels the woman even more. Note that during pregnancy, abstinence from sex is not a whim of a woman, but a serious recommendation from a doctor! You can prove as much as you like that a colleague and his wife did not change the quality of intimate life with the onset of pregnancy, but do not forget that each organism is individual, and in contrast to your story, a wife can tell how her friend ended up in a hospital bed after sexual contact with her husband. Sometimes, indeed, a woman can refuse intimacy with her husband, even without the guidance of a gynecologist. Perhaps she intuitively feels that this will not affect her pregnancy in the best way and be afraid for the child (forgive her this suspiciousness, she wants it to be the best), or her libido has decreased, and she really just does not want sex to disgust. The second option, indeed, is common among many pregnant women, and they cannot do anything about it.

All the forces of the spouse are taken by the family or work

The wife is so tired at work or doing family affairs that she simply does not have physical strength left for the intimate sphere of life. There are women who manage to do everything in the world and feel great, almost never sitting down for a minute during the day. Often such energetic persons grow out of hyperactive girls. And yet, do not forget that it is not for nothing that most women are considered weak and fragile creatures for a reason. Of course, this does not mean that they do not need to do anything at work and at home so that their husband can periodically enjoy sex with them, but still, often they are really forced to take on responsibilities that they cannot afford.

Which families usually face this problem? Option one: in the morning, the wife goes to work, where she spends the bulk of the day, performing her work duties. She comes home at about the same time as her husband (even if a little earlier). After work, she goes to the stove, cooks dinner, does chores around the house, checks on the child's homework, or does anything else that doesn't look like just sitting on the couch. What is your husband doing after work? He rests, believing that his wife is engaged in quite easy "women's duties." After resting and gaining strength after a working day, a man is ready for sexual exploits, while his life partner dreams of only one thing - sleep. Some husbands are indignant that sex is not work, “lie down and have fun,” and yet a woman thinks so - whatever one may say, at least some physical activity must be shown. If a woman is very tired during the day, then thoughts of intimacy do not excite her at all, and the most pleasant picture that she can imagine is taking a hot bath and a sweet dream.

You have ceased to be an attractive macho for her.

Your appearance has changed significantly since the first dates with your wife. And we are not talking about natural age-related changes - gray hair or wrinkles. Surely, you know examples of how, with age, some men, on the contrary, acquire a special attraction for women. Many celebrities can serve as an example, including Robert Downey Jr., George Clooney, Tom Cruise and others. These men did not spit on themselves, and still remain the heroes of women's dreams. Can you say that you look sexy and alluring to the opposite sex (not just your wife)? Some people, both men and women, having entered into marriage, stop monitoring their appearance, believing that since they have found their other half, they no longer need to attract the attention of other potential partners. This is a big mistake, because if you stopped taking care of yourself, then, for sure, you lost your attractiveness not only for other women, but also for your spouse.

The wife often remains unsatisfied after sex

Some women tell their spouse about this right at the beginning of a relationship or at a time when the quality of their sexual life with him begins to deteriorate. If a man does not pay due attention to this problem, then over time, having lost hope that the situation may change, the wife stops expressing her claims or hinting at them, and instead simply tries to avoid intimacy, not feeling satisfied from her. Note that if a woman does not get real pleasure from sex with some man, then she considers such a pastime with him to be just wasted time. For the first months or even years, the wife may not show it, but later it will become increasingly difficult for her to hide her disappointment and irritation.

The wife has a lover

This is the saddest development of events that can be for you in this situation. Of course, it is quite difficult to justify a woman who has decided to have a connection on the side, but still you should not shift the responsibility in this situation solely to the partner. Think well, can it be that in some way you are also to blame for the fact that your wife has a lover? Were you both satisfied with the quality of your marital sex life; Did you give your wife the attention she needed? Have you yourself been seen in the past in any affair on the side? Did you create an unbearable emotional atmosphere in the house, as a result of which the wife could begin to look for an outlet on the side? Can you tell that she looked like a really happy woman next to you? Give yourself honest answers to these questions.

If the wife nevertheless has a lover, then this fully explains why she avoids intimacy with you. In the case of infidelity, men and women behave differently. A man can be spurred on by his affair on the side, as a result of which intimate life with his wife becomes richer and more diverse. Women act in a completely different way - often they focus their attention on only one man. In this case, we are talking about a lover. Having received from a new partner what she lacked in marriage, a woman can sincerely fall in love with this man and even believe that by having sex with her husband, she is cheating on “her man”.

Be that as it may, if a woman nevertheless decided to take this step, you have low chances to improve relations in the family, and, most likely, for a number of reasons, in the end you still have to disperse.

What to do if the wife refuses intimacy with her husband

Of course, such behavior on the part of the spouse cannot be unreasonable. Try to figure out what exactly dictated the wife's reluctance to enter into intimacy with you. In fact, there may be several options.

Find out the reasons for not wanting to sleep together

The easiest way to clarify this question is to ask your wife directly. Pick a good time to talk. This conversation should not start when you or your spouse are irritated or either of you is feeling tired. In this state of affairs, most likely, either a scandal or a crumpled and completely unproductive conversation awaits you. It would be most appropriate to invite your spouse to a romantic dinner, and raise your concern in a relaxed atmosphere. Please note that your conversation should not look like an interrogation with an addiction - in this way, you only risk ruining the evening. After a glass of wine, seeing that the wife is relaxed and happy in the evening, offer to talk about what is bothering you. Immediately explain that you are not making a claim to her, but simply want to understand in which direction you should move in order for your family life to become better and suit both of you. If the spouse is not in the mood for a conversation, do not put pressure on her and do not show aggression. Close the topic, and don't let this evening end badly. Undoubtedly, the wife will appreciate such a step, and next time she will be more open with you.

Take on all the responsibilities of a man

Often the reasons why a woman refuses to have sex with her husband lie on the surface, but the man simply does not want to notice them, quite rightly not seeing the connection between a broken refrigerator and his wife's unwillingness to have intimacy. And yet, it is useful for many husbands to know that if they refuse to take on men's duties with enviable regularity, delaying the solution of the problem as much as possible, then, sadly, a woman ceases to see a man in him. As a result, this extends to other spheres of life - not only household ones. As soon as you begin to monitor the health of the appliances in the house, do not shy away from the requests of your wife and your obvious duties, you will begin to notice how the attitude of the spouse gradually begins to change. As a result, the solution to your problem may be much easier than you think.

Help her in everyday life and with children

For some time now, it has become so customary that some families (mainly at the suggestion of a man) have divided responsibilities into male and female. what does it usually look like? A man once a season nails a nail and repairs a junk TV, and a woman devotes several hours of her life every day to cleaning, cooking, washing, ironing, doing homework with children, and the like. This situation is tolerable when a woman is in the status of a housewife, and a man is the only breadwinner in the family. Nevertheless, such situations often occur in families where the husband and wife work almost on an equal footing, only now the husband rests after work, and the wife "steps into the second shift." Over time, a woman begins to understand that it is very difficult for her in such a marriage, and she begins to think about divorce as a “liberation”. For many men, such a problem seems far-fetched, and in the meantime, more and more women feel unhappy and tired, and, accordingly, in this position it is quite difficult to inflame passion for a spouse.

Let her feel that she is loved and desired.

Let the beloved woman, being next to you, feel that she once married yours for a reason, and now she is just as desirable for you as at the very beginning of the relationship. How to achieve this? First of all, do not forget about the compliments that many husbands eventually begin to neglect in family life. Pay attention if your wife has a new hairstyle or just styled her hair in an unusual way; if she smells of pleasant perfume; talk about how beautiful her smile, eyes are (this is nice to hear not only at the initial stages of dating). In general, compliment not only her culinary skills, as is often the case in marriage - “Borscht was especially successful today”, “The meat was well baked”, “What a magnificent pie!” and so on - but also her looks. Even if you do not notice any special changes in your wife, tell her pleasant words- this can be a great motivation for her to become better and more beautiful, because she will know that "her husband notices."

Give compliments and give flowers

Compliments have already been mentioned, but this is exactly the topic that requires particularly close attention, and it should be remembered not in passing, but well understood - it is really very important for a woman to hear words of admiration from a man. Have you ever thought about how a lover usually appears in the life of a woman? Often it looks like this: the wife is tired of everyday life and has not felt the attention and delight from her husband for a long time. All their topics come down to children, products, cleaning. taking out the garbage, repairing and other topics devoid of any romance. Then a “little miracle” happens in the woman’s life: a certain man tells her that she has luxurious hair or “cornflower blue” eyes. From that moment on, she begins to think about these words, about this man - she remembers that she is not only a caring mother, spouse and mistress, but also a woman who can evoke romantic thoughts in a man. If she has enough romance and family life, then she will simply pass by her ears any characteristic of her smile, eyes and melodic laughter.

Give your beloved woman flowers, make unusual surprises for her, talk about how she is loved and desired, pay attention to changes in appearance, express delight, say kind words, and you will become for her best man Which is impossible not to want.

Pleasantly surprise her in bed with new caresses or poses

Over time, the performance of marital duty for many couples becomes somehow mechanical. Everything goes according to the “knurled scheme”, and takes a minimum amount of time or looks pretty monotonous. Each sexual intercourse is similar to the previous one, and practically does not cause any trepidation, both for the husband and the wife. You are quite capable of correcting this situation. Please note that new experiments should not be started when the wife falls down after a hard day's work. It is best to arrange a romantic evening for the two of you, relax with a glass of wine, “warm up” a woman with affectionate words, and only then get down to business.

This evening, make yourself an installation - first of all, you want to please your wife in bed. Surely, during your married life, you managed to study the erogenous zones of your beloved. Now you can experience new caresses in these areas, having previously watched an erotic film (choose a project that is popular with a female audience). You can also read relevant literature or ask your beloved if she has any fantasies about this. Experiment with the position, but this night should not be like a beginner acrobat's course - you should not try many innovations at once, in such conditions it is quite difficult for a woman to concentrate and begin to enjoy the process.

What does Orthodoxy say about this?

The Orthodox Church encourages the fulfillment of marital duty - this is a natural phenomenon between loving spouses. It is also worth noting that the church classifies adultery as a sin and, therefore, treats them negatively. In addition, any priest will tell you that it is better to refrain from intimacy during fasting, although there are no strict instructions on this matter either - such abstinence should be a mature decision of a husband and wife, which is not dictated by fear of punishment.

• Talk to each other. Most problems are completely solved when the husband and wife begin to talk about them with each other, and try to find the best compromise. The conversation, of course, should not take place in a raised voice - it is important to choose the right time for dialogue, without putting pressure on your partner, without expressing your displeasure and irritation, but sincerely trying to understand what are the ways to solve an unpleasant situation.
• A change of scenery. In many families, problems begin due to the fact that relationships are mired in everyday matters, and cease to differ in any variety. Until you reach the “boiling point”, it is best to change the disgusting environment and forget about your home and work responsibilities for a while, devoting your attention exclusively to each other. The easiest way to do this is on vacation - allow yourself at least a short trip (weekend), and make such outings your family tradition - this will only affect marriage in a positive way. Go on tours that suit both of you - otherwise the trip can become another reason for a quarrel. Example: husband loves calm beach holiday, and the wife loves to go to museums and exhibitions, but the choice is made in accordance with the preferences of only one of the parties.
• Notice your mistakes. Many families are faced with misunderstandings in relationships and cooling of feelings, due to the fact that they are trying to shift the blame for a collapsing family on the shoulders of a partner. If you notice this feature behind you, then you should seriously reconsider your views. Do not think about how bad your partner is, and how many difficulties have arisen in your marriage solely because of him. It is much more productive to start solving the problem with yourself. Think about what you can do for your marriage, for your other half, so that the atmosphere in the family improves. The partner, noticing that you put pressure on him and do not demand "feats", but instead are trying for the good of the family, will surely be able to draw the right conclusions for himself and begin to take an example from you.

What to do? How to deal with it? Marital dynamo, intimate boycott and sexual blockade. What are we talking about?

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How many times a week should a husband perform marital duties?

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When marrying, all young couples are sure that it is their family that will be the strongest and happiest. svadebka team. What is marital duty in a relationship of spouses? In the first months after the painting, the fulfillment of marital duty gives the newlyweds exceptional pleasure.

But, alas, over time, life and a number of other circumstances of family life after the wedding begin to seize. And one of the frequent problems in families is that the wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty or does it reluctantly. If we are not talking about the lack of love and the presence of a third in a relationship, then we can identify a number of reasons that negatively affect the sexual life of spouses.

What affects the quality of a couple's intimate relationship: Early marriage. As a rule, young newlyweds do not have much sexual experience and eventually begin to annoy each other. As a result, more and more often there is interest, but how is it, on the side; Cohabitation with parents.

Agree, it is difficult to fully relax and enjoy each other when parents are resting behind the wall. Afraid to make an extra sound, the couple is unlikely to decide on experiments. But this is precisely what is important in sexual relations; Accommodation in the same room with children. And the older the children, the more acute the question of the fulfillment of marital duty arises, which, again, has an extremely negative effect on the relationship of spouses; Busy schedule and household chores.

When the day is busy and scheduled by the minute, by the end of the day it can be difficult to find the strength even for a conversation, not to mention sex. And most often it is the tough work schedule that becomes the reason why the husband refuses to fulfill his marital duty; Appearance.

Of course, this moment applies to both spouses. Otherwise, he goes to seek sexual satisfaction on the side. Any of us can fall in love with our own husband again and again.

But if problems arise in a family with sexual satisfaction, it is worth either on your own or with the help of a specialist to understand psychology family relations. The law on marital debt In the fall of the year, Deputy E. Mizulina proposed introducing a fine for men who evade the performance of marital duty or perform it, let's say, without much enthusiasm.

Moreover, the minimum norm for men under 45 is also stipulated - once a week! Whether the bill will be passed, time will tell. But at the moment, in the Family Code of the Russian Federation there are no obligations and prohibitions regarding intimate relationships in married couples.

Therefore, if a wife or husband does not fulfill their marital duty, it is unlikely that they will be punished according to the law. The exception is the marriage contract. At the same time, the points should not contradict the current legislation - prostitution, humiliation of human dignity, etc. And yet, what is marital duty under the law: The couple equally solves joint issues related to family life; Husband and wife have the right to independently choose their occupation, profession, place of residence and stay; It is the responsibility of spouses to build family relationships based on mutual assistance and respect.

Each of the couple should contribute to the strengthening of the family and participate in its well-being, take care of the development and well-being of children. An emotional and rich intimate life is the key to good relationships and mutual understanding in a married couple.

What should a husband do when his wife doesn't want sex?

But a wise wife can, let's say, correct her husband's shortcomings. Women's wisdom is generally quite mysterious and the most sought-after ingredient of being. Wise women, according to urban myths and legends, are almost omnipotent and capable of doing the impossible. Wise wives are often put as the antipode of sawmill wives, they say, you don’t need to saw your husband, but you need to act somehow very cunningly and wisely, but it’s not clear how exactly. Many men simply do not even notice the efforts of their wife in domestic work, or even grossly devalue them. Like, what's wrong, washed the floor, wiped the dust or cooked chicken in a delicious sauce with vegetables. Others may not, and in general, this is your sacred duty, wife.

Why does a wife not want intimacy with her husband?

What threatens a woman to refuse sex with her husband social network received from her husband an Excel spreadsheet with a record of all the refusals of sex. According to the document, out of 28 attempts to have sex within a month and a half, three globallookpress were successful. In nature, there are hundreds and even more ways refuse to have sex with your husband. What women do not go to not fulfill their marital duty, and what they just do not come up with.

Rare sex: People around are sure that best couple they have not seen in life, and this is true. And that they don’t want to touch each other at all, only the two of them know. They prefer to endure this in silence: But in vain:

Leave a comment How many times a week should a husband perform marital duties?

But most problems can be solved or not brought to them at all, if you learn not only to listen, but also to hear your husband's wife. Below are the answers of the Muslim theologian Shamil Alyautdinov about solving intimate problems from the point of view of Islam. What should I do if I have lost sexual interest in my wife? How to tell her about it?

Why the wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty -:,.

What to do for a husband when his wife does not want sex Warning: Let's first look at what men usually do when they do not receive reciprocity in the performance of their marital duty. There are habitual strategies of male behavior that could work at some stage of the relationship, but then stopped, or did not work initially. This is the following behavior: A man demands sex, gets sex, insists on sex, begs for sex.

If the wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty The wife does not give ... And from that moment on, she will inevitably consider her husband a weakling. And from this, her weapon will become even stronger.

Question from a reader: is it possible to sue a husband if he does not fulfill his marital duty?

What threatens a woman to refuse sex with her husband

Not every priest dares to speak on this topic in public - then they will definitely label him either an obscurantist or a liberal. Father Daniil Sysoev, who was killed in November of the year, was one of the few who is not afraid to answer people any questions that concern them. AP Question:

According to scientists, love exists for three years. Just for the Wife refuses to fulfill her conjugal duty: possible reasons.

Spousal debt - what is it?

Just during this period, grinding and getting used to each other takes place. The same happens with intimate life: It is then that your sex turns into a marital obligation, and its regular absence intuitively makes it clear about the crisis of family relationships. Let's deal with what is meant by marital debt, along with the Weddingbagolic portal.

If the wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty Info Psychologist's advice What recommendations can be given to spouses experiencing a crisis in intimate relationships? Talk to each other. Most problems are completely solved when the husband and wife begin to talk about them with each other, and try to find the best compromise.

According to scientists, love exists for three years. Just during this period, grinding and getting used to each other takes place. The same thing happens with an intimate life: at first you are exhausted from desire, you interfere with the sleep of your neighbors, enjoying each other like on your wedding night, and after a while the passion subsides.

It is then that your sex turns into a marital obligation, and its regular absence intuitively makes it clear about the crisis of family relationships. Let's deal with what marital debt implies, together with the Svadbagolik.ru portal.

The law on marital debt: legal or moral side?

When concluding a marriage, the spouses undertake to comply with legal acts which are closely related to the strengthening of the family union, concern for material well-being, equal fulfillment of duties for the upbringing and development of children.

Moral aspects of the concept of marital duty

What is marital debt under the law? This term is now considered only from the moral side, because from a legal point of view, there are no fixed obligations of an intimate nature to the spouses.

The marital duty performed by a husband and wife is not only regular sex, but also constant joint work on maintaining family relationships. Intimate relationships in a marriage without love, understanding and care turn into a routine that kills the feelings of the spouses.

Relationships in an official or civil marriage are not a candy-bouquet period, because there are a lot of factors that can affect their quality. These can be cohabitation with parents, the appearance of children in the family, morally and physically exhausting work, fatigue, etc. However, if there is love in marriage, all obstacles can be overcome together.

Where did the "debt" come from?

The origin and true meaning of the concept of "marital duty" is still unknown. There are only some guesses as to why intimacy in marriage, which should bring pleasure, is called duty.

Earlier, when the concept of marriage for love practically did not exist, women were given in marriage for convenience, including for debts. It is logical to assume that somewhere in that period this slightly contradictory phrase arose.

The wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty: possible reasons

Failure to fulfill marital duty most often offends men. Someone begins to consider his wife untemperamental, cold, sometimes even frigid, and then, almost with amazement, finds out that she has a lover.

The other one, on the contrary, makes up for the lack thrill on the side. Why is this happening? Let's find out the reasons why a wife refuses to fulfill her marital duty, because they often become the main reasons for divorce, as www.site found out:

As many say, you didn’t give up and suffer alone. Why are families falling apart so much today? The answer is simple - there is no mutual understanding, there is no mutual desire. Just become boring or worldly fuss (being) Took away all the beauty and romance. Well, where to go from this being, what to do in order to actually become happy man. Most of all, you need to look deep into yourself. Change something inside yourself and then everything will go uphill and everything will work out. And romance and passion and a great desire ... Everything will return, only you need the right priorities, they need to be valued and respected with feelings, you can’t play. And then you will not sit alone like a fool.

Let's talk about one question - why does the wife refuse her husband sex?

How often do you hear from men "The wife does not give, I don’t understand the reason, I don’t know what to do" ... Is it possible to reason with her?

I want to start with one parable. From the life of animals. From the sex life of gorillas.
Behind them - one male and five females, biologists have been watching for several years. And they noticed: some representatives of the weaker monkey sex often and persistently offer sex to the male, depicting an extreme degree of readiness. At the same time, the one who is already pregnant is the most active - she clings to her "husband", the father of her unborn child. Why, one wonders, if the goal has already been achieved and the continuation of the family is ensured? And then, it turns out that the male is not distracted by other females. According to scientists, such behavior became a harbinger of monogamy in humans.
Salt of the parable: even monkeys understand that the male needs sex, that he strengthens the family. And here are some human people they don't understand it.

"I'm tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep"
Sexless - psychologists use this term to denote a disgusting phenomenon that has struck both Western and Russian society. Namely, the lack of regular sexual intercourse between spouses. It happens, of course, that husbands also deprive their wives of intimate attention. But women are more often denied intimacy. And men, tormented by their libido, hear: "I'm tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep." Or quite offensive: “Where did you go?”

Psychologists have found the answer. But you won't believe how simple and straightforward it is.
The author of one song sings these words: "You refused me three times, that's how you are ..."
An amazing experiment was conducted by a sex therapist from Australia, Bettina Arndt. She asked 98 men and women (spouses) to keep anonymous diaries of their intimate lives for a year. And tell them the truth. After getting what she wanted, the researcher wrote a whole book
"Why Women Quit Sex and Other Bedroom Battles."
Bettina did not make a shocking discovery, discovering that there are many reasons. And they are usually different for everyone. But I did come across a few common ones.
First: most wives for some reason believe that sex should be only when, there and the way they want. But at the same time, they do not convey their thoughts to their husbands. And they just refuse. Like, he should understand. And he, the goat, does not understand. And climb. And offended even then.
In other words, wives make husbands guilty of untimely harassment. And they themselves are offended by them - such is it female logic. And this resentment, in turn, becomes a reason for refusal ...
Second: the wife holds some kind of spite against her husband, even a very small one: for example, she didn’t take out the garbage, didn’t ask how she was doing at work, her mother-in-law said nasty things. And, pouting, "punishes" the deprivation of intimacy. But again, does not state the reason for the sex strike. They are silent as hell.
But, even saying those very notorious “I'm tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep,” many women omit the details. Or maybe they really had a hard day at work. And they are so preoccupied with her that there is not even a place in their head for thoughts about sex.
But dear readers, what is the conclusion: the bedroom is not a battlefield for psychics, and husbands are not quick-witted telepaths. They need to be explained in detail. And do not bring the matter to deep resentment.

No need for romance, it's better to go straight to bed.
“I love my wife,” someone says, essentially confirming the conclusion of the Australian researcher. - I want a wife all the time, although we have been together for 20 years. And she didn't tell me. And all the talk on this topic does not give anything. She doesn’t go to the doctor: “I’m not sick!” Physically healthy - porn turns on her, but knowing this, she doesn't allow her to turn it on. And nothing helps: we go on holidays, go to restaurants, and go to dances - romance is more than enough ... "
Bettina explains that passion, and even elementary lust, which pushes the newlyweds into each other's arms, cannot last forever. And even more so, it manifests itself equally in both spouses. Yes, even after many years. The production of the sex hormones responsible for it - passion - fades away in about 18 months.
The researcher has found the most primitive production enhancer - sex. But how can one “treat” with sex, if it is just not there?! Very simple, says Bettina. I can't through. Through "tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep."
A woman must realize the perniciousness of sexless, understand how painful it is for loving husband destructive to the family. And do not refuse, always agree when the husband asks. Unless, of course, she had an attack of appendicitis.